As I was driving home the song "Freebird" was on the radio. It is one of my favorite songs and as I listened to the lyrics I suddenly realized that was what was so amazing about the last couple months of my life: March, April, May. I was very free. I had commitments, but to things I loved and cared about. They were loose commitments. I had friends both where I was and where I wasn't. But because of my full attention to where I was, I didn't spend a lot of unnecessary time with the people who were where I wasn't. And, the people who were where I was were all low maintenance (well, the ones I was spending time with towards the end) and they allowed me to feel light, to feel warm and free. I felt part of something, but only because I had let go of so many of the things I was clinging to.
So now I am back to where I wasn't before and I am attempting to maintain contact with people who I spent time with in London or in The Czech while trying to reconnect with Hope people and trying to reestablish some sort of relationship with people here, in Ohio. It's tiring to think about. I want to reconnect with more people. I want to know what is going on with your life, but sometimes I'm wondering if it's too far to reach with just a phone call. After all, I'm not the only one who gained more self-revelations this semester. And then there are some friends whom you call and you are so glad you did. It feels as if you are close as peas again. Then you call others and you never get called back. I had the lack of returns. To be honest, all the friend frustration boils down to that...
And the unemployment frustration. Why aren't they calling me either? Sure some of the applications were turned in to places that "may not be hiring, but it wouldn't hurt to fill one out..." or to places like Applebees who "don't hire just summer help," but don't tell you until you go in the second time. And I understand my evenings m-f being unavailable don't help, but still... This part of the life is in my bottom 10 for least favorite life necessary activities... job searching.
Well, nothing to do, but fill out more... Off I go (online of course)! Wish me luck!
And I will wish you the same because chances are good you're in the same boat...
No comments:
Post a Comment