Showing posts with label Heartache. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Heartache. Show all posts

Friday, January 8, 2010

There's really no good time for anyone to leave

My room hasn't been this empty since the summer before third grade when my sister and I moved into it. The bed frame that replaced hers in now in the car, accompanied by my mattresses, ready to go to Holland in the morning. My cat must know I am leaving because she has been spending even more time with me than usual. Looking at my room and knowing that it has been 8 years since I was a freshman in high school... or since I played soccer or since... well, I don't know. It just shakes me a bit.

I don't like endings. Leaving London, the Czech, and New York were all difficult. However, graduation from college is bigger ending than all of those. It is bigger than graduating high school. I have no idea what comes next and the probability of my returning to most of the places I have been is slim.

I like learning because I am that much closer to my battle with the unknown. It's times like these that lead me to believe that I am fighting in vain. Of course, as soon as I imagine giving up I remember that I'd rather walk near-sightedly with my eyes open than to close them altogether. And so, as long as the weather cooperates, I am off to Holland in morning. Let's hope for dry roads and an easy adjustment.