My past week has been a mix of "UGH!" experiences and giant sighs of relief (or other feelings which are the opposite of "UGH!").
Bike Accident vs. New Friend [the night before]
I bought a bike last week. By riding my bike to work I was hoping to reduce the amount of money I would spend on the Subway and increase the amount of exercise I was getting. This plan almost worked.
I later realized that because of bad weather, lack of time, excessive distances, and frustration with pedestrian and car traffic, I would still be riding the Subway so much that it was the most fiscally responsible choice to buy the monthly pass. I bought one yesterday.
The Saturday after I bought the bike I was riding to Bryant Park and was affirmed that the tire, which I had refilled the day before, had something wrong with the tube and needed a new one. The back tire was completely flat so I stopped riding, took it onto the subway (the bruises on my legs wish I had insisted on buying a lighter bike) and got to Bryant Park half-way through the concert. Instead of taking my bike all the way back to East Harlem I decided I would just take it across town and leave it at work. The building was open and I had office keys. There's even a bike shop down the street I could get it fixed at. Well, the door guy wouldn't let me take it up and I ended up paying (the bike got more and more expensive as time went on...) the gym next door to let me leave the bike with them; I didn't trust my cheap target lock overnight.
So, Monday came around, through some sneaky help from Jose, who works at the gym I managed to get the bike up into my office and had an uncomfortable day at the desk. However, I got it fixed that night and rode it home. About half-way home I was stopped at a light and met a new friend. We ended up walking 2-1/2 miles together and enjoyed some quality getting-to-know-you conversation. Woo! Benefit of having a bike, comfortable timing to start a conversation at a stop light.
And! I could still ride my bike to work sometimes just for the exercise! Right?
Well, the next day I went to ride my bike to work and about a mile into the ride along the East River Bike Path (so no, I wasn't biking on the sidewalks) a pedestrian, who had been walking in a straight line in the middle of the path, suddenly decided he wanted to move to the left as I was passing him. I moved slightly to the left, my handle bar was caught in the fence and I went down.. hard. The guy just looked at me on the ground and walked away. Woo for rude people! I got up and sat on the side of the path for a little bit nursing my boo-boos. My left knee was a royal mess, my hand had all sorts of grossness in it, my right knee had a bruise forming, my right elbow was bleeding, and my right back shoulder was scraped up. Sometimes when things like that happen you just need to sit and cry. I left a message on the work machine that I'd be late and I sat and cried. A couple minutes later a guy came by and asked if I had broken anything. I said no and he told me to not cry about it for too long then. I wasn't sure how to take his advice, but in time I remembered that I needed to get to work so I did. I was sore for the next few days and today (Sunday) was the first day I ran again. My back still sort of hurts from it. So, the bike has not increased my exercising.
At this point, I think the 'ugh' bike accident won this one.
Solo Date Night: Soda vs. The Moth
Thursday I decided to take myself on a date. I took the B/D down to the West Village to see a Moth Story Slam. The train I was on had to wait for a stalled train up ahead so I arrived 30 minutes later than I thought I would. While it was still an hour before it started, the line was long so I decided I'd eat dinner afterward and get in line before I risked not being able to get in. While in line I, for the first time in a long time, told the guy in line that was talking to (not with) me that I was not interested in having the conversation. Maybe it's just me, but after a long day at work, I don't want to be lectured on Goldman Sachs's bonuses. I tried my best to be polite and I don't think I offended the guy. Truthful politeness is beneficial; Preaching to the choir is not.
The Moth Story Slam was enjoyable and it was something on my list that I'm glad I kept an eye on... worth the $8.
After the Story Slam I ventured off to the MacBar, where I had intended to go before hand. I wanted to scope it out for future visitors. Delicious. I had the Mayan Chipolte, but, as chipolte often does, it required a beverage. However, the liquids at the MacBar were all overpriced so I decided to just eat quickly and get a less overpriced something-or-other at the corner store down the road. I ended up buying a $1.29 glass soda... the kind you usually see at Mexican restaurants. Of course, once I walked away from the store I realized it wasn't a twist off. Way too cool to go back to ask if they had a bottle opener, but too thirsty to not drink it until I was home, I decided to look for something I could pop it off with. I found an unguarded police barrier and decided it was just the thing. Well, I pulled and pulled and it wouldn't come off. Finally I just yanked the bottle. I had moved my top hand... the cap flew and bam! I drank a bit quick and then attempted to discreetly hold the bottle against my eye, hoping that it would keep the swelling down so I wouldn't have to admit I received a black eye from a bottle cap.
I was fairly successful.
The fact that the bookstore, Housing Works (great books and great mission, check it out) where the Story Slam occurred, had Peter Hall's Diaries for $8 and I went back the following evening to purchase it only added bonus points.
Failing at Giving Up Sugar vs. ReWWing (again)
A couple of days ago I thought I could join Heather in giving up sugar. I did really well for the first 24-48 hours. Day 3... sigh.
So I decided I need more structure and accountability. So, it's back to the Weight Watchers' counter on my phone I go! I wish I had had more success with giving up sugar. I know messing up one day doesn't mean I can't give it up the next day, and I am definitely going to attempt to stay in that area, but I think more of my focus will go to WW. It's clearer in its 'you did well!' or didn't.
Panic Attack on Subway vs. Counting by 14's
Yesterday Cameron, Lindsay, Jay (a new friend of Lindsay's), and I were in the East Village. We had lunch together and then went to 16 Handles (they mean the handles you pull down for soft serve, but I try to remember that I don't want 16 Love Handles). Then it was suggested we eat it in the park, I thought they meant the one on Ave A. They meant the one that I used to love walking by becasue of the great people and now it just makes my heart hurt. I thought, maybe, I could still go, but as soon as I walked in my chest tightened up and I had to leave. I sat outside the park and focused on breathing and ice cream... realized I wasn't going to recompose myself despite the deliciousness and told L, C, & J I was going home.
After getting on the 6 train I sat and focused on one spot; I was fine. Then, they held the train and didn't open the doors... for 5-8 minutes. They're supposed to open the doors. They had broken my focus. I was messy. They finally opened the doors before they departed and I got off the train. I stood and counted up by 14, starting from a number not divisible by 14.
I stepped onto the next train and took a nap when I got home. I was back in the world.
I like to think the win goes to the Number 14.
Needing People vs Having People
Do you ever have those moments when all you seem to be able to do is miss people and feel nostalgic for other times? Lately I have been missing having a cross country team more and more. I, daily, miss my housemates [spring 10] and my close friends from other parts and times of my life.
It's the strangest paradox because I become so frustrated at myself for NEEDING these people. I'd like to imagine that I can be happy and productive without them. However, I do have them, and I am endlessly grateful for them.
I guess at the end of the day it's a tie and I win?
3 Weeks Vs. 3 Weeks
Leaving a job that makes you restless: a giant sigh of relief
Not having a job and being completely unsure of what happens next: a little scarier
I am trusting in the world that I will win out in this one. How can't I? I am leaving before I begin to COMPLETELY brush off my job, and my employers and I are on the same page. I left our meeting and felt an incredible adrenaline rush and a weight off my shoulders.
Plus, the Waiting Room [waiting for a certain job to just show up] is not for me.
That's not for you!
Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing."
They may be figurative Boom Bands, but yes, yes, I will.